Sunday, November 29, 2009


I celebrated my 50th birthday on November 17, one of those landmark birthdays. I have never been bothered by my age, but I have found myself contemplating my life a little more thoroughly and taking stock of all I have accomplished and what I still want to do with my life. I have been reading Marianne Williamson's The Age of Miracles,  and really enjoying her thoughts on midlife. We all have some regrets and we all have dreams, but this is no time to get stuck and wallow, but a time to start living each and every day to the fullest if you haven't been doing so yet this far. I believe I have been doing pretty well, but sometimes get stuck on a regret or a sorrow and have to pull myself back to living the moment! I also realize some really great opportunities are fleeting like a three year old granddaughter saying, "Granmma, will you hold me?" while I'm unloading the dishwasher and that instant of saying, "I will be through in a minute," and then realizing this is one of those moments you don't put off, you just grab it and enjoy because someone else will finish unloading or I can come back to it in awhile. As you might guess, this did happen on Thanksgiving day, and I laughed at myself as I quickly ran after her and grabbed her up in my arms.

We have so much to be thankful for everyday no matter our circumstances, no matter our past, our future, our regrets, our happiness, our sorrows. Finding just one simple pleasure in each day can make the difference in whether or not you choose happiness for yourself. I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend, and let us all remember to be thankful all year and not just during the holidays! Spend some time this week writing about the little things that bring you happiness! (Like scooping up that little one in your arms!) Choose happiness!

Friday, November 27, 2009

Choosing Happiness After Divorce to air on KENW-TV

Quick update on program I filmed at KENW-TV a public television station located on the campus of Eastern New Mexico University campus in Portales, New Mexico. The show, Choosing Happiness After Divorce, will air Monday, November 30 at 10:30 a.m. on 3-1 (HD), Tuesday, December 1 at 8:30 p.m. on regular cable 3 and 3-2 and again on Sunday, December 6 at 2:30 p.m. again on regular cable. They are hoping to go national with this program during the March pledge drive. Ask your local public television station to carry this program.

I discuss seven keys to happiness and how following the information in my book can help you to choose happiness each day in your life. We had a live audience and a great response to the program. I hope you will watch if you are in the Portales area and if not, call or email your local station and ask them to carry this program!

I have been slow on updating my blog lately. I have been on the road so much and have become a bit discouraged about whether I'm reaching others, but I have decided that maybe I have been looking at this wrong and that if I want followers I will need to just write and they will come! Right?

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving! I have been enjoying the thanksgiving of a new grandson in our lives, as well as my other three grandchildren and my sons and their wives. Life is incredibly good, and being able to spend this holiday with them has been wonderful!

So watch for my new more frequent postings and I hope you will let me know what brings happiness to your life!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Welcome to the World Payton!

Last night at 10:22 p.m. Payton Matthew arrived in this world! He weighed in at 6 pounds 11 ounces, the first baby of my son Matthew and my daughter-in-law, Sara. What a joyful occassion for our entire family! Living too far away to be there for the birth, I am anxiously awaiting my flight on the 21st to be there with them and to celebrate Thanksgiving together! Talk about happy! My favorite holiday combined with the bonus of a new grandbaby, I can hardly contain my joy! As I write though, I know there are those living in the pain of divorce, finding it difficult to choose happiness on even the most joyful occassions, but this is what I know, choice is the key word here. You have the choice each and every moment of every day to choose happiness, to find the joy in the moment, to celebrate all life has to offer.

I am the gramma who does not live near by, who doesn't get to revel in the daily pleasures of being close to children and grandchildren and all they have to offer. I also live with the knowledge that my ex lives in the same town and remarried this summer, and I know that they will play an active part in little baby Payton's life. I could choose to be jealous, or bitter, or sad, or any number of emotions, but instead I choose to look at it this way: I have a new grandson who is and will be loved by all the grandparents and we will each form our bonds with him in our own ways and enjoy the happiness he brings. All the new relationships that arise after divorce can be tough, but when we as adults act in a mature, loving, kind manner, the children can survive and thrive, and overcome the mistakes of their parents and hopefully choose happiness for themselves!

If you are struggling with the other relationships your children or grandchildren are forming with the new additions to their lives, spend some time writing about your feelings. List all the positives new relationships can bring to our lives and consider this, to be loved by many is far greater than to live closed off and bitter towards step-parents or step-grandparents. Be the example and model love and kindness. You will make a difference and be loved far greater for your efforts!