Thursday, May 16, 2013
If you landed here, please enjoy the posts. My blog is now located at: Choosing Happiness After Divorce. I hope you will visit and check it out. If you would like to do a guest blog, and share your story of finding happiness after divorce, please contact me, firstname.lastname@example.org.
You can also find me most often at My Ultimate Health, over on Jane Ann Thompson.com.
Monday, September 10, 2012
In modern times, we use the word martyr to indicate someone who considers themselves a victim. Taking on victim status can be pretty easy after divorce, however, being a victim is not going to serve one well for very long. Being a victim essentially locks you in a tower of your own making, one friends will quickly desert and grow tired of, one that will keep you from moving forward in your life, and is certainly not going to include happiness.
If you are feeling like a victim for any reason, it's time to stop the pity party and start counting all for which you can be grateful. It is natural to go through a feeling sorry for yourself stage after divorce, but staying there is not going to benefit you are your children. Move on. Decide to make a new life for yourself and make it great. You only live once, so what's your life going to be? Martyr or Life Maker?
Tips for leaving the pity party: Spend time every day writing down a few things for which you are grateful. Inspire yourself by reading about someone who has faced incredible adversity. I just read the book, Breaking Night: A Memoir of Forgiveness, Survival and My Journey from Homeless to Harvard, by Liz Murray and believe me, when you read this young woman's story, I think you will see how great your life really is and can be!
Peace and joy!
Monday, August 13, 2012
Approximately 60 percent of U.S. children living in mother-only families are impoverished, compared with only 11 percent in two-parent family homes, according to research at the university of Ohio. I watched my sister deal with this very problem as she raised her kids, put herself through college, and then struggled on a beginning teacher salary. However, poverty due to income, while it can make day to day existence difficult, poverty of joy and intellect can destroy lives. Poverty does not just apply to income. When any of us, children and adults alike, are deprived of love and kindness, as well as intellectual stimulation, our lives become narrow and dark. Divorce can make the walls seem like they are closing around us, but refusing to narrow our world and staying in the light, can make the difference. And this doesn't just apply to divorce. Anyone is in danger of poverty of spirit by closing themselves off from others or from learning. If you are a single parent, bitterness and anger will definitely narrow your world, but most in danger is the world of your children. Allow them to freely love their other parent and his/her family. Love goes a long way in keeping the spirit nourished and joyful. As for the intellect? Avoid allowing the television, computer, and video games to raise your kids. Get out of the house. Take advantage of free activities available in the community. Read together. Hike. Do chores together. Travel if possible and expose yourself and the children to new ideas. And let others assist in positive ways, including even a stepmom or stepfather. And if new siblings or step-siblings come on the scene, be sure to include them when possible. Poverty of money makes life difficult for the moment, but poverty of the mind and spirit makes all of life a struggle.
Peace and Joy!
Monday, August 6, 2012
Need help transforming?
Monday, July 23, 2012
Peace and Joy!
Monday, July 16, 2012
Unfortunately, I have seen far too often, parents set out for revenge through their children, turning them against the other parent, the grandparents and other extended family. This is abusive and will affect their ability to trust and bond with a spouse in their future. If you make their relationship decisions for them now by turning them against people who love them and they in-turn loved, they will not make the best decisions for themselves when the time comes.
Share your children generously. Their world will be far better and more populated with love when they see that the two of you are willing to allow them to love you both. Children are not your pawns, but developing humans who need more than anything love.
Peace and joy to you,
P.S. If your spouse is seriously turning the children against you, read Divorce Poison, by Dr. Richard Warshak and get help before it is too late.
Thursday, July 12, 2012
A lot has happened over the last year. My new website is off the ground and running, but because it is primarily about health, I feel like I left my Choosing Happiness friends out in the cold. I am returning to this blog and will be posting every Monday. I am adding posts about remarriage after divorce as well so look for this addition. I look forward, as always, to your comments and hope you will join me here each Monday for a Choosing Happiness message. Find me also at www.janeannthompson.com, which will be coming soon with a totally new layout and indexed recipes. Have a great weekend and I'll see you Monday!
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
June 1, 2011 is the launch date for my new website, www.janeannthompson.com. Please join me there for my blog on health and happiness or to order my book, Choosing Happiness After Divorce. Sorry it has taken so long to get the new site running, but life interrupted. See you soon!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Hello readers! Sorry for the dropping out of sight. We had some changes in circumstances around here that has caused some tough times, but forgiveness goes a long way in healing the upset and that is the road I am on! But now for the great news! I have a new website coming that will include my blog! As soon as I am set up I will get the word out and tell you where to find me! Look for the ability to have my blog delivered straight to your email and lots of features to make the sight fun and exciting! I am learning about Twitter and will be joining to send you messages each day! "What's making me happy today" will be the theme with something different each day to think about! Hope you are all enjoying the holiday spirit and celebrating with friends and family your blessings each day! prayers and love to all!
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
I Thessalonians 5: 16-18My brain is overflowing with information from the She Speaks Conference of Proverbs 31 Ministries, but more importantly, my heart is bursting with the impact of this amazing experience. Surrounded by women in every season of life, hearing incredible speakers, attending seminars with a wealth of wisdom, I am happy and blessed to have been a part of this event! I participated in a speakers evaluation group and connected with a group of women who will long remain in my memory and heart. (We managed to get a picture of almost all of us just before departing.) There were 608 women in attendance at the conference. The air was filled with the electricity of all the vibrant personalities, the laughter, the tears, the chatter; sometimes I would just stop and listen to the buzz of it all! All the speakers had messages that hit home with me and I know with the others in the room. Lysa Terkurst, Angela Thomas, Karen Ehman, and Beth Moore who made a special video appearance, sharing with us insights on drawing closer to God through letting him speak through our messages.
God has not always been a presence in my life. He had a questionable presence during my formative years and once an adult I went through an agnostic period. I only came back to God when after my divorce I knew I could not walk through this world alone. As I began to seek him and pray to him, I felt his presence and have seen the evidence of his presence in my life. This weekend filled me with his spirit and convicted me to share with you the impact he makes daily in my life.
Whether you believe in God or not, as you heal from divorce, I encourage you to seek his presence. Maybe like me, you grew away from him at sometime in your life, and realize now you would like to have him present again, begin to pray and soon you will see the evidence that he has never left you. If you have never had the presence of God in your life, I encourage you to begin on the most incredible journey of your life and seek our lord and savior to guide you and protect you, to comfort and council, to love you far greater than any human is capable. Pray that God will enter your heart then begin to study and learn what he has to offer. Put your faith in God and your life will change. Choosing happiness is made so much easier when God is walking there beside you. Seek the help of spiritual leaders, faithful sisters and brothers in Christ, and study your Bible daily. Take these steps and I know your happiness will be there for the enjoying! Prayers and Love to you all!